Harming of the Soul
Posted on 14th January 2022
It's official, we punish ourselves deliberately...
Like self harming of the soul. Let me tell you about Yasmin.
Yasmin is 29 years old. She has a first class degree and she has a very good job with an insurance firm. She was on the fast track to a senior role and maybe even a main board role one day.
Then, Yasmin met herself in the mirror one evening.
She stood there in the half light of her bedroom looking at her reflection. Then, slowly over the course of a few minutes, Yasmin took a firm grip of her soul and she choked the life out of it.
She had a scar on her arm from a childhood accident, which detracted from the smoothness of her skin.
Her bed was empty, she had no-one to share it with.
Her body was lop-sided which made her ugly.
Her stomach a little too big, her nose a little too small, her eyes were not quite blue.
Her hair hung from her head, it did not cascade like the women in the pictures.
She reflected on the meeting earlier today when she did not react as quickly as others to the new idea being floated, because she did not fully understand it, because she was stupid.
The joke she cracked did not reduce the room to fits of laughter.
The shoes she wore today had a chip missing from the heel and everybody noticed.
Her social media accounts popped occasionally but they did not sizzle like that other woman in the office.
The senior manager from Accounts looked down his nose at her and had a look of repulsion on his face.
The perfume she had put on today had faded by lunchtime and she had faded it with it.
I stood alongside Yasmin and we looked at the mirror together.
"The world is full of people with childhood scars and the only person who will notice that is the person applying sunscreen when you are lying by the pool. The reason they are applying sunscreen is because they adore you.
Your bed is empty because you spend too much time staring at the mirror looking for the imperfection and not enough time noticing the people waving frantically to catch your attention.
Bodily imperfection is common to us all. The perfect body is available but only when enhanced and remodelled. There are people out there who want to adore your 'imperfect' body.
The hanging hair? It is wet, Yasmin, you have just stepped out of the shower!!
Meetings are competitions. Some people feel the need to perform like seals in them and some people just exude quiet confidence. Oh and the joke, they giggled, you just didn't notice.
They did look at your shoes but they noticed the fantastic shoes and the shape of your calf not the chip, not a single individual noticed the chip.
Her social media accounts pop because she parades herself which is absolutely her choice but not your style.
He did not look down his nose at you, he was checking you out. He has been doing it for months!"
There is always another story and your contribution to this world is precious. Don't be Yasmin, be you and the world loves you, promise.
Tagged as: #lightnothate, Susceptible, Vulnerable
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